Top 10 Beach No-Nos

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While the Darlings spent this past week at the beach, I learned a few things I will NOT be doing on my future beachy vacations.  Take note my friends and thank me later, mkay?

{1} Do not wear your designer swimsuit and Yellow Box flips to the beach.  They are just gonna get covered in sand.  And then you get to feel the grit in your bottoms for weeks……

{2} Don’t expect to eat your lovingly-prepared ham & swiss on rye without a side of sand.  See note above – everything, yes everything will get covered in sand.  Mmmmm…so good, blech…..more grit.

{3} Do not just put on sunscreen every few hours and expect to not be RED – Get out the big guns – I’m talking the 100 SPF (yep, they do make it – Water Babies by Coppertone!) applied it.

{4} Honey, Don’t wear your Maui Jims while playing in the waves with the kids….don’t make me tell you twice! Just go and buy some cheapys from WallyWorld for the beach.

{5} Please do not throw your butts in the sand.  Don’t make me tell you what butts I’m talking about (the ones my 2 year old likes to pick up and hand to me….)

{6} Don’t yell to your kids, “Oh my gosh, Look at that shark!” when it is really just a lovely pod of dolphins swimming nearby.

{7} And please don’t mistake the lovely aformentioned dolphins for sharks.  Sharks don’t jump out of the water and land on their backs. I promise you…, you can go back in the water.  Ignore that crazy lady over there.

{8} Don’t expect your swim suit to stay up if it’s a little big on you and your playing in the waves. Seriously, it’s not attractive….

{9} Don’t expect your sweet baby to not rub sand in his eyes…especially when you are constantly rubbing the “stick” sunscreen all over him – that stuff attracts sand.  Remember….sand gets every where.

{10} And don’t you dare expect to go to the beach a NOT have a great time.  Seriously.  We had the best family vacation we have had in a while.  We had perfect sunny days, gorgeous white sand, cool blue water – what’s not to love?

We enjoyed every smile, laugh, and squeal that came from our kids. And yes, the sand was worth it.

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  1. says

    I thought I would share one of my favorite ideas for the beach. Bring an inflatable baby pool or inflatable boat to fill with water to keep under your beach umbrella. It’s a great way to keep the kids out of the sun for a bit and rinse your hands before you eat a snack.

  2. says

    Amen to not wearing the nice shoes. Seriously. The nice swim suit I don’t mind SO much because it’s really not “designer” but nothing irritates me more than messing up a VERY decent pair of shoes!


  3. says

    One tip to help with the sand….baby powder! MAGIC! It is a staple in our beach bags along with the sunscreen. Works great to get the sand off to enjoy a sand-free ‘sand’wich 😉

  4. bill says

    I spent years looking for the perfect pair of sunglasses. I finally found a pair of Maui Jim’s while on vacation. We ended up spending WAY too much for them ($289.00) at the gift shop for the Pacific Whale Foundation in Maalaea, Maui. Sadly, after taking good care of those glasses for a few years, last week I discovered I have lost them. I am so mad at myself, but we had a great time snorkeling that day and we absolutely had a blast with our girls on all of those beaches in Maui.